


Building It Up

by LittleSweetCheeks



Series: Family Matters [1]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Angst, Family, Gen, Infant Death, M/M, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-13
Updated: 2016-08-23
Packaged: 2018-08-08 14:16:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 11,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7761106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleSweetCheeks/pseuds/LittleSweetCheeks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As they both lay to the side, panting, Hotch pulled himself free and rolled the love of his life onto his back, “I love you.”  He kissed him deeply, “Let’s have a baby.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is the prequel to my story Too Much.

Annual Leave fell in the summer and Aaron Hotchner and Spencer Reid opted to take their separately, with only three days overlapping.  It meant a week each in the office without their partner, but it also meant seventeen days straight for Jack to have a parent home full time.

Aaron’s week off had been a week of Jack convincing him to go swimming and taking his eager son on every errand he had to run.  The boy was old enough to look forward to AL time and lavished in the extra attention it brought.

In the two years his dad and Spencer had been an official couple, Jack had also gotten used to having the other man around to spend time with as well.  The three days both of his parents were off, they had rented a house on the beach and spent all of their free time at the water.

Spencer’s week off was always more fun.  He took Jack all sorts of cool places that even his dad didn’t have access to. They did experiments and went to cool stores.  Jack secretly looked forward to ‘Spencer time’.

Just because splitting leave had been Hotch’s idea, didn’t mean he particularly loved it in practice.  Reid had managed to take leave at the same time as the rest of the team, so Aaron was left spending eight hours a day all alone.  Each evening though, he came home to find Spencer at the stove teaching Jack how to cook something.  The first couple nights, he pulled Spencer in for a quick kiss and was swatted out of the room.  The next couple nights, he arrived anticipating what would greet him and pulled the younger man into his strong arms, allowing his pleasure at the sight to nudge against Spencer’s ass.

The sixth night, when he walked through the door, Spencer was again at the stove but without Jack.  Hotch hurried to take his lover in his arms and this time the man returned his embrace.

“Jessica said she missed Jack and took him away earlier.”

Hotch was slightly surprised, she hadn’t texted him about anything.

Spencer pulled Aaron’s hips in, “I made chicken parm.  We can eat now or later.”

Aaron leaned in for a deep kiss, nibbling at Spencer’s lip.  “Later.”

After quickly making sure everything was turned off, they walked carefully to the bedroom, kissing the entire time.  Spencer grinned when he felt the strings being pulled loose from his apron.  He reached up and began to loosen the stiff Windsor knot of Hotch’s tie.  Eventually they worked down to bare skin and Reid fell back onto the bed, open and waiting.

Hotch looked down at the man he loved.  “God you’re perfect.”  He lifted both of Spencer’s feet and pushed up as he crawled onto the bed, that’s when he saw it and it left him breathless.  “When did you get this?”  He traced a finger gently around the dark plug,

Reid smiled, “I picked it up earlier this week.  A little covert assistance from someone I know.  You like it?”

“Do I like it?”  He stared from his lover, down to the plug, and back again, “I love it.”  He trailed his fingers down Spencer’s thighs and over his butt cheeks, finally brushing along the sides of the plug.  He maneuvered it from side to side, tugging and pressing.  He watched his lover’s face as his played with the toy.  Finally he couldn’t stand it anymore, he took the lube from the nightstand and slicked up his length.  Once he was ready, he tugged out the plug and pressed into Spencer in one slick motion.

Reid arched up off the bed, moaning and cursing.

Hotch chuckled and pulled almost all of the way out again before slamming back in.  “Coming home to find you ready for me, I may not last long.”  He continued his long hard strokes.

Reid trailed his fingers down Hotch’s hips, grabbing hard on one side before grabbing his own length with the other hand.  “There’s more.”

“More?”

Reid nodded, enjoying the dual sensation of Hotch finally picking up speed inside him while he only teased his cock.  “It was a two pack, we can each use one.”

“Damn,” Hotch grunted.  He pulled back, kneeling upright, “Roll over,” he dropped both of Reid’s feet to one side.

Reid shuffled, feeling Hotch rotating inside of him.  Once he was on his hands and knees, Hotch picked up a desperate pace.  This position meant he couldn’t stroke himself; he had to rely on Hotch’s strong hands.

Aaron eventually reached around and started pumping the younger man’s cock as he angled to continuously hit his prostate.  Very quickly Spencer was coming hard on the sheet below himself.  A moment later, Hotch stiffened as he filled the younger man with his fluids.

As they both lay to the side, panting, Hotch pulled himself free and rolled the love of his life onto his back, “I love you.”  He kissed him deeply, “Let’s have a baby.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this fic was completed until last weekend when my computer ate almost all 15k words of it. Leaving me with a mere 1,500 to work with. So instead of posting every couple days until complete, I will have to retype and then post. But I will stay a few chapters ahead so it shouldn't go too slow.

_He kissed him deeply, “Let’s have a baby.”_

Spencer looked up at the declaration, “Do I need to remind you how human reproduction works?”

Aaron chuckled, “No, I know.  I just…coming home here to you this week.  It’s been nice and I…”

“You miss it a little.”  Spencer finished.

“I love you.  I’m not comparing”

“I know.”  He cut him off.  “I get it.”

“Well?”

“I…I never wanted kids of my own, too many risks.”  He rolled out of bed to clean up, afraid to see sadness in Hotch’s eyes.

“Okay, but any child from either of us would be ours.  Yes?”

Spence nodded.

“I know this is sudden, but…I want to be a family forever in whatever sense of the word we can have.  Three of us, four, six, twelve!”

Reid looked horrified at the prospect, but calmed when Hotch laughed.  “I’ll think about it.”

Aaron nodded and let it go.

=====

It had been weeks since their conversation and Spencer had assumed Aaron had forgotten all about it.  It was lunchtime and Spencer had stayed behind dealing with a phone consult.  Once he hung up, he collected his files and headed to Aaron’s office to leave them to be signed off on.  Spencer dropped the heavy folders and a sheet of paper blew sideways across the desk.  The sheet below it caught Reid’s eye and he froze.

After a minute, he slowly edged the top sheet over, giving full view to what lay beneath.  It was an informational booklet about surrogacy options in Virginia.  His chest tightened as he hurried out of the office and down the stairs.

Once outside, he stopped and leaned against a tree, pulling out his phone.  He texted Hotch, “ _I need to be out of the office the rest of the day.  Call me if there’s a case.”_

_“Is everything okay?”_

_-“I just need to get out for a while.”_

_“Reid?”_

_“Spencer?”_

_“Please talk to me.”_

_-“I will see you at home for dinner.”_

_“Okay.”_

Spencer stared at his phone while he waited on the metro.  Hotch had obviously not forgotten.  Spencer hadn’t thought he was really serious.  He tried to think of their life with a new baby in it.  Would one of them need to stop working?  Did Hotch expect him to stay home?  He clearly had enjoyed coming home to Reid being domestic during leave.  When the metro arrived, Spencer sank into a seat and rode around until it started to get dark.

=====

Hotch frowned at his phone.

“Everything alright?”

He looked up at his longtime friend, “I don’t know.  Spencer had to leave, didn’t say why.”

“What _did_ he say?”

“That he will see me at home for dinner.”

Rossi shrugged, “I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about.  He’ll probably fill you in then.  Probably an article came out in some journal or something,” the man grinned.

Hotch sighed and slipped his phone back into his pocket, “Maybe.”

When Hotch sat at his desk after lunch, he quickly noticed paperwork was out of place.  As he shuffled the files Spence had dropped off before he left back into a neat stack, the brochure slipped to the floor.  He felt his chest squeeze, there was no way Reid had missed it.  Aaron picked up the papers and sank into his chair.  The idea had been popping up randomly for some time; he’d always wanted a large family.  He’d humored the idea by requesting more information from a website, occasionally skimming over it.  There had even been dreams lately of getting to bring home a new baby, all of them snuggled onto the couch.

=====

Spencer was sitting curled into a chair when Aaron entered the silent house.  He watched his lover carefully set down his briefcase and remove his shoes; going through his entire evening routine in silence.

Eventually Aaron sat on the table in from of the younger man.  “Talk to me.  Please?”

“You were serious.  You were doing research and…  You really want this.”

“It was always just a dream, but yes, I was serious.”

“How would that work?”  He asked softly.

“How would what work?”

“This!  A baby and what we do!  We both work crazy jobs and are gone a lot.”  He pushed up in his seat.  “Would you expect me to quit and stay home?”

“What?  No!  What made you think that?  I don’t want you to give up your job.”

“I had noticed over leave you really seemed to like coming home to me in the kitchen.”

Hotch was silent.  He had enjoyed coming home to his partner and son waiting on him, but he’d never considered it happening full time.  He couldn’t even imagine work without Reid there.  “I don’t want that.”

“Then how would it work?”

“I… I hadn’t thought about it.”

“I don’t want two of our kids raised by full time sitters.  Maybe before you start researching surrogates you should research how we would raise a baby.”  Spencer stood, gathering his blanket, and vanished into the bedroom.  He stopped just before shutting the door, “I love you.”

Aaron watched the door shut,  “I love you too.”  He replied to the closed door.

=====

Aaron silently made dinner for Jack and himself.  He knew he had a lot to think about, a lot of questions to answer.  Jack seemed to feel the tension coming off his father and ate his dinner and finished his homework quietly. 

When the kitchen had been cleaned up and the lights mostly turned off, Aaron sat in a chair by the window and thought about the future.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A mini chapter until the next one is ready.

Two weeks later, after a meeting with their Section Chief, Hotch had a plan.  He waited until Jack had gone to bed for the night and brought two bottles of beer into the living room.  “Can we talk?”

Spencer looked up from his book, “Yeah.”  He slid the book away.

Aaron sighed and sat down, “I’ve been thinking and I think I’ve come up with some possible plans.  The first option is that I just retire from active duty, I have enough years and I can always lecture.”

Spencer frowned and chewed his lip, “You would be miserable.”

Hotch folded his hands together, “Another option is that I go to just desk work.  Take a promotion or something.”

“No.”  He shook his head, “Next option?”

“We rotate travel.  One of us works from the office with Garcia and the other travels.  We either simply alternate or decide depending on the type of case.”

Spencer thought for a minute, looking for any flaws in the plan, “That could work.”

Hotch lit up momentarily before tamping down on his excitement, “Really?”

“Yeah.”  Spencer smiled softly as Aaron pulled him over for a hug.  “Do you have that brochure with you?”

Hotch pulled back, “In my briefcase.”

“Can I see it?  How do we get started?”

Hotch fetched the brochure and watched his lover devour the information.


	4. Chapter 4

The wait to be seen by the clinic they’d chosen had taken two months, which according to some sources wasn’t bad at all.  Their first visit went over their background and explained what to expect in the coming months as well as the costs. 

The pair left their meeting with a goal of selecting a surrogate to carry their baby.  Spencer was hunched over the laptop at the kitchen table which Aaron cooked dinner.

“Does it really matter?”

Spencer didn’t look up, “Aaron, we’ll be around this woman for as much as a year.  Maybe longer.  Compatibility is important.  Here,” He tapped the screen, “Young woman in her twenties.  One child already. ”

Aaron rounded the table to have a look.  “Annie.”  He read the small amount of information provided, “If you think so, let’s set up whatever we need to to meet.”

Spencer nodded and typed away.  “There’s a couple other things we need to think about.”

“What’s that?”

“An egg donor and telling the team.”

=====

They managed to meet Annie in person and hit it off with her.  She shared that she was in law school and Aaron had offered to help her with any classes should she need help. 

Once they agreed that she would carry their baby, Spencer suggested she come over for dinner the following weekend.

=====

Morgan and Will were in the living room battling each other on a video game with Jack and Henry cheering them on.  Garcia was teasing them as they took hits from the other.

Hotch and Reid were in the kitchen cooking with Emily and Dave sitting at the bar critiquing their efforts.  JJ sat halfway between the two groups, watching everything going on.  When the doorbell rang, she was closest and opened it to find a young woman standing on the other side.  “Can I help you?”

“I’m looking for Aaron and Spencer?  They invited me for dinner?”

JJ stepped back and motioned for her to come in.  “I’m JJ; they’re just in the kitchen.”

“I’m Annie” She followed the blonde into the room.

Spencer lit up when he saw her, “You came!”  He motioned her to an empty stool, “Dinner is almost ready.  This is Emily and David, Please ignore them, they’re food snobs.”

Emily laughed and tossed a crouton at him.

He dodged and continued, “Guys, this is Annie.”

Emily extended her hand, “How do you know them?”

“We’ll cover all of that once we sit,” Aaron transferred the last of the food to a dish and turned off the stove, “Let everyone know it’s time to eat.”

JJ went to collect the boys and everyone headed to the table.

Once the food was disbursed, Dave turned to Annie, “So, what do you do?”

“I’m a law student.”

“Ahh.  And how do you know these two?”

Spencer jumped in, “She’s going to be our surrogate.”

There was a single moment of silence before the room erupted in questions.

Aaron raised his hand and waited for everyone to settle down.   “One at a time.”

“You’re going to have a baby?”  Garcia asked.

Dave jumped in, “You’re far enough along that you’ve picked a surrogate and are just now saying something?”

Annie pushed back her chair, “Maybe I should.”

Emily put her hand on Annie’s arm, “Stay.  We’re fine, it’s just a surprise.”

The younger woman stayed seated, “I thought you all already knew they were doing this.”

Dave shrugged, “We didn’t, but we do now.  This sounds just like something Reid would do.”  He turned to Jack, “And what do you think?”

“I want a little brother.  Dad says it’ll be a while though.”

Garcia squealed and stood, rushing to the first of the family which happened to be Hotch and pulled him into a smothering hug, “A new little baby genius!”

Desperate for air, he patted her arm, when she released him, “I’m glad you’re excited for us, but it’s a process and might be a while.  It might not work at all.”

“I’ll send magic baby dust your way!”

Aaron pulled slightly away and eyed the analyst as she returned to her seat.

=====

After another meeting with the clinic, Hotch and Spencer were sent away to consider an egg donor from the clinic’s list.  Spencer was leaned over the laptop on a flight home, scribbling down donor numbers and details to consider.

Emily sank down in the seat across from him, “What’re you doing?”

“Looking at egg donors.”

“Oh.  I didn’t know you’d need that.”

Reid raised one eyebrow at her, “Can’t exactly use our own.”

Emily let out a sharp laugh, “No!  That’s not what I meant.  I thought that…Annie?  Would do it.”

“No.  Separate donor, separate carrier.  Hotch and I are each compiling a list and then we’ll compare.”

“Can I take a look?”  She gestured to the computer.

“Sure.”  He pushed it across to her. 

“Parameters?”

“Over five foot five, educated, dark hair and eyes, physically fit.”

“Okay.”  She shooed him away, “Let me browse, go get coffee or something.”

Spencer nodded and slid out, heading to the other end of the jet.

=====

Aaron was sitting at the kitchen table comparing their lists. “Spencer?  I don’t see this donor ID anywhere.”

“Maybe it got pulled?”  Spencer came over and leaned over his shoulder.  “I didn’t write that, Emily must have.”

“Emily?”

“She asked what I was up to yesterday on the flight home.  Wanted to have a look.”  He shrugged.

“Oh.”  Hotch squinted at the page.  “Maybe she wrote the number down wrong.  I’ll see who matches this entry.”  Twenty minutes later, “No one.”

“What?”

“This doesn’t match any entry.”

“It has to.”  Spencer returned and looked at the entry, “Emily.”

“You told me she wrote it.”

“No, Emily.  Look at the code.  Birth date here and look at the stats.  Emily.”

Hotch frowned, “Do you think she did it as a joke?”

“I doubt it.  That’s not something she would do.”

He sat back and tapped his fingers on the table, “Do you think she’s seriously offering?”

Spencer chewed his lip.  “Maybe.”

Hotch stared at the page and thought about the idea.

“She fits our preferences and she’s driven.  Determined.”  Reid smiled to himself.

“What?”

“Morgan said once that she’s you in heels.” 

“Remind me to fire him.”  Hotch chuckled.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I will go ahead and add this as well since I'm not sure what my weekend will look like.

After sitting down with Emily, the pair quickly realized she was very serious and they made arrangements for her to meet with the staff at the clinic.  After agreeing to several meetings with a therapist about any feelings about donation that might come up, everyone was ready to move ahead with the proceedings.

Two months later, they were given the go ahead to do egg retrieval and start the process.

JJ had come with Emily to the procedure and once Emily’ part was over; she came to the waiting room.  “Everything went fine, they got eight eggs,”

“Eight?”  Hotch asked.

“Yeah, they look promising.  Emily’s relaxing and I said I’d come back to her.  Now it’s your turn.”  She motioned past the men to the nurse headed their way.

Spencer gave Aaron a hug, “Relax.”

“Can’t you come with me?”

“No.  Go.  You’ll be fine.”

“I’m pretty sure making Jack didn’t stress me out this much.”

Spencer smirked, “Performance anxiety is normal.”

Aaron shot him a dirty look and cast a quick side glance to their teammate.  “I’m fine.”  He turned on his heel and followed the nurse.  Once in the small room, Aaron took a moment to study what was there.  A small TV with an assortment of DVDs, a stack of magazines that looked old and an armchair.  “This isn’t going to work.”  He mumbled to himself.  He sank into the chair, trying not to think about what might have touched it in the past, and gathered the supplies out of the small bag.  He tried to flip through the magazines, but nothing felt right and he wasn’t about to try the videos.

He pulled out his phone and sent a text. “ _I don’t think I can do this like this.”_

_“Is there somewhere to sit?”_

_“Yeah, I’m sitting down.”_

_“Undo your belt and slacks and lean back.  Close your eyes and count to twenty.  Relax starting with your toes as you count.”_

_“Hold on.”_   There was a pause, “ _Now what?”_

_“Remember last week when you cornered me in the hotel room in Memphis?  We knew Morgan could return any time but you pressed me against the wall and kissed me so hard neither of us could breathe.”_

Hotch thought back to that evening, tried to let himself feel that some urge again.  After a minute he felt his body start to respond.

_“I started rubbing you through your slacks.  It drove you crazy not to be free.  Can you feel my hands rubbing you?”_

_“God yes.”_ Hotch palmed himself with his left hand, surprised to find himself now erect.  He ghosted his hand over his member and down to fondle his balls.  Once Spencer had gotten him worked up, Aaron had dropped to his knees and opened the front of Spencer’s slacks, taking the younger man’s erection into his mouth.  He rarely gave Reid a blowjob and they never did anything while working, but one of the officers had been flirting mercilessly all day and it had driven Aaron mad with want.  He could remember the feel of Spencer’s fingers in his hair as he bobbed and sucked, all the while the friction of his trousers sending waves of pleasure through his body.

_“You on your knees, risking getting caught, it was so hot.  It took all I had to hold on as long as I did.”_

“Who are you texting?”

Spencer’s head popped up and he flushed even darker.

JJ gasped, “Dear lord are you sexting Hotch?”

“Uhh…”

JJ turned on her heel and left him.

Hotch could feel the warmth pooling in his belly now.  He remembered being on the floor, nothing stopping Morgan from walking right in.  When Spencer’s back had arched, thrusting his hips forward, Aaron swallowed his throbbing member.  The feel of Aaron’s throat muscled constricting around his head was what pushed Reid, shouting, over the edge.  Aaron had shuddered against him and moaned deeply, coming embarrassingly, still fully dressed.

Hotch had reached a furious pace and as the need to release overwhelmed him, he leaned to one side in time to empty him load into the container he’d been provided.  He groaned through the waves until he finally sagged back into the chair, gasping for air.    After several minutes, Aaron gathered himself and cleaned up.  He eyed the now-sealed container slightly surprised at how full it seemed to be.  He’d never seen his ejaculate in this manner before.  Another beep told him he had another message.

_“Better?”_

_“Done now.”_

_“JJ busted me.”_

Hotch chuckled, “ _Better you than me.”_

_“Well, what you were doing wasn’t a secret.”_


	6. Chapter 6

After leaving the clinic, the pair picked up Jack and headed out for dinner.  Jack had chattered nonstop the whole evening and right up until the light was turned out in his room.  Spencer sank down on the bed next to Aaron, but exhausted.  “His energy never stops.”

“He’s excited about this baby stuff.”

Spencer rolled onto his side and kissed the older man, “Me too.”

“Really?”

He thought a second, “Yes.  I am excited.  Another little Jack running around.”

=====

Three days later they got word that six of the embryos took and the doctor was ready to try and implant two of them into Annie, the rest would be frozen for the time being.

After they had gotten Annie to and from the procedure and made sure she was settled in, they headed home.  Jessica had agreed to keep Jack.

Aaron pressed a kiss to Spencer’s lips as soon as they walked through the door.  “We just made a baby.”

“I know.”  Spencer continued the kissing as Aaron’s hands wandered.  “Where?”

“Tonight is your choice.  Tell me what you want.”

Spencer pulled his boyfriend close.  “Go strip and lay in the middle of the bed.  On your back.”  He stepped back and allowed the other man to move away.

Aaron obediently set right to work stripping off his layers.  Once he was naked he stretched out on their bed and rolled onto his back and spotted Spencer in the doorway watching him, cock out and stroking slowly.  “I’m all yours.”

“I’ll be right back.”  He stepped into the bathroom, “Close your eyes.”

Aaron tried to listen to the sounds of his partner undressing and moving around in the bathroom.  He heard soft footsteps as he approached and then settled on the bed.  A hand on his knee nudged his knees apart. A warm hand, coated in lube, tugged at his cock and then moved down to trace circles around his hole.  He gasped slightly as one finger breeched him, working him open.  He remained silent as Spencer silently worked in a second finger and then a third.  He heard himself whine as the fingers were taken away and then found himself pressing down as a plug was pressed into him. 

Spencer studied Hotch’s responses as his prepped the older man and inserted the plug.  He had one more thing to sort out before they started.  He reached over and picked something up from the nightstand and gave it a stretch.  Hotch’s eyes popped open as he realized he was also now wearing a cock ring.  Spencer leaned in for a kiss.

Aaron brought his hands up and buried them in Spencer’s hair.  The kissing became Spencer sucking at his jaw and throat before working his way down his body.  Finally, after a torturous amount of time, Spencer wrapped his lips around Aaron’s cock.  He set a grueling pace of sucking and licking, driving the man beneath him mad.  Once Aaron was to the point of begging, Spencer sat up and toyed with the plug, pressing it in and out several times before removing it and swiftly sinking into his lover.

Aaron gasped and cursed at the sudden change in feeling.  Spencer pounded into him, held upright by Hotch’s knees against his chest.  When Aaron felt Reid’s rhythm begin to stutter, he begged, “Fill me.”

Spencer pushed Aaron’s legs out of the way and leaned in, sucking his mouth into a deep kiss before groaning his climax into him.  He continued pumping, riding out the sensation until it became too much.  He eased Aaron’s legs back down, knees out, like that had been before and pulled out, standing up.  He took in his own release dribbling out of Hotch and Hotch’s cock leaking and leaving smears of pre-come on his own stomach.  Spencer put his hand out and pulled his lover up, “Let’s shower.  No touching.”

Aaron followed his lover into the bathroom and tried not to shift as he waited for the water to warm up.  He waited until Spencer pressed him into the cubicle and then waited for instruction.

“Fuck me,”  Spencer whispered into his ear.

Aaron instantly pushed him against the wall and was surprised to find Spencer wearing a plug of his own.  He pulled it out and plunged in with the same power Spencer had used on the bed.  Soon enough, Spencer was begging and then coming again all over the shower wall.  Aaron panted, still seated inside Reid’s ass, and pressed his forehead into the younger man’s shoulder.  “Please?”  It came out as more of a beg that he’d intended.  “Please, I need to come.”

Spencer pressed off the wall, nudging Aaron back and shifted, waiting for Aaron to slide out of him.  Once he was free, Spencer lathered a cloth and washed Aaron from shoulder to knee before tossing the cloth aside.  Reid knelt on the tile floor and carefully eased the cock ring off, taking care not to brush Aaron’s straining member in any way.  He blew a gentle breath against it and took Aaron’s hips in his hands.  “You can you can touch anywhere but yourself.  Are you close?”

“God, so close.”  Aaron gasped as another breath ghosted over his aching erection.  “I need to come.  Please Spencer.”  He pressed one hand against the wall and the other in Spencer’s hair.

Spencer made sore he had a good grip on Aaron’s hip and ass.  “Come for me Aaron.”  He softly demanded, allowing another breath to pass.  He felt Aaron begin to tremble, “Come Aaron.”

Aaron felt his eyes rolls back at Spencer’s words and then he was coming all over his kneeling lover.  He trusted Spencer would hold him upright as he felt his release pulse out in long strands.  Eventually the trembling stopped and Spencer carefully stood, allowing the cooling water to run over both of them.

Spencer pulled Aaron in for a kiss, “God that was perfect.”  He kissed him again, “Perfect for the day we made our baby.”

=====

It was a two week wait to find out if the procedure worked.  Aaron was pacing nervously in the exam room while Annie lay on the table and Spencer sat in a chair, watching him amusedly.

“Aaron, relax.  We’ll find out soon enough.”

Aaron stopped intent on a reply when the door opened and the doctor walked in.  “Well, boys and girls, it looks like we will be having a baby.” 

Spencer beamed, “It worked?”

The doctor nodded, “Yes.  Now.  Let’s have a look and see how man we have in there, shall we?”

“How many?”  Aaron asked, sitting hard in his seat.

The doctor’s shrugged, “Sometimes you get twins, occasionally more.  But let’s have a look.”

Aaron hadn’t thought about the prospect of multiples and tuned out what was happening in the room as he thought about them trying to juggle two babies.  He startled when Spencer nudged him.  “Huh?”

“Look, that’s our baby.”

“Baby?  One?”

The doctor nodded, “Just one baby.  Looks plenty healthy.”

Annie turned from the screen, “Congratulations guys.  I’m so excited for you.”

Aaron took Spencer’s hand and gave it a squeeze.

=====

They tried to keep a straight face as they entered the office the next morning.  Reid made a beeline for the coffee pot, head down while Hotch turned and headed to his office.  It took exactly fifteen minutes of quiet before Dave was standing in his doorway, sizing him up.

Hotch chose to ignore his friend for the time being and continue working so he kept his head down and didn’t even offer a good morning. 

Dave watched his friend try very hard not to react and turned to study their young genius, who was also trying his hardest to look very busy.  Finally Dave pushed into the office and sat in a chair, “Wasn’t there an appointment yesterday?”

“I’m sorry?”  Hotch glanced up and immediately regretted it.

Rossi saw the look on his friend’s face and broke into a grin, “We need to celebrate!”

“Dave…”

“Aaron, this is a big deal.  You guys are having a baby.”  He leaned forward, elbows on knees.  “It’s exciting.  Have you told the others yet?”

“No, not yet.”

The older agent looked out the window and saw the rest of their team just wandering in.  “I will.”  He shot up and to the door.  “Oh good, you’re all here!”

Everyone turned as Hotch reached his friend and tried to stop him, “Dave.”

Rossi continued unhindered, “Guess who’s having a baby!”

Aaron flinched in sympathy as the cries of excitement started and everyone grabbed for Spencer, being the closest, hugging him and patting his shoulder.  A minute later the excitement made its way up to him and he found himself receiving hugs from everyone.

Rossi set to inviting everyone for a celebratory dinner and made sure Jack and Annie would be there as well.

=====

Aaron and Spencer found that the first few months flew by with little change.  Doctor’s appointments were still few and far between and Annie wasn’t anywhere near showing yet and they had a backlog of work to deal with.  Before they knew it, they were at the sixteen week appointment.

Aaron was amazed at how much the baby was starting to look like a baby on the ultrasound.  He couldn’t peel his eyes away from the tiny being moving around, kicking and squirming.

“Is it a boy?”  Jack asked.

The doctor looked at the excited older brother, “We won’t know for sure till next month.  Are you wanting a brother?”

“Yeah.  Girls are okay, but I think a brother would be better.”

Everyone smiled at him.  As they left they arranged the appointment to find out gender.

After Jack was in bed, Aaron found Spencer sitting in the living room by the window.  He joined him on the couch, watching him deep in thought.

“Aaron?”

“Yeah?”

Spencer studied him a minute, like he was trying to memorize him.  “We’re adding to our family.”

Aaron smiled softly, “I know.”

“Aaron?”  He said again.

The older man reached out and took his offered hand. 

“Will you marry me?”


	7. Chapter 7

Dave had been mid swig of his scotch when Hotch had finally decided to admit why he had come.  He coughed to clear his throat, “He asked you to marry him?  And you said….?”

“I just stared at him.  He got up and walked away finally.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why didn’t you say yes?  You’re having a baby with him!  You live with him!”

“I had always figured I’d be asking him.  I was just so surprised.”

“So why haven’t you said yes yet then?  When did he ask?”

“After our appointment.”

There was a thunk as Dave’s head hit the wood table in dramatic fashion.  “You’re what’s making me go grey.  You know that?”

Hotch rolled his eyes at his friend’s antics.  When Dave sat back up he asked, “Now I feel like the longer I wait, the worse it’s getting.”

“Follow your gut.  He’ll understand.  God knows he’s a more patient man than I if he’s waited nearly a week for an answer from the guy he’s having a baby with.”

“Yeah.”

Dave studied his a minute, “So… Am I clearing my schedule and my lawn again for a wedding?”

Aaron polished off his drink and then nodded.  He stood and looked around the bar for the rest of their group.  Spencer was in the corner helping Morgan play pool.  Hotch walked across the room and took his partner by the arms, pressing him into the wall and pressing a kiss hard to his lips.

Morgan stood stunned, watching the pair make out.

Finally Aaron came up for air and leaned his cheek against Reid’s, “Yes.  Yes yes yes and a thousand times yes.”

Spencer smiled into Aaron’s neck before pulling him into another kiss.

=====

The wedding had been perfect.  Aaron was watching everyone mill around as the meal was finishing and the band was starting up.  Dave had outdone himself with the decorations and subtle hints to each man’s personality.  He watched Spencer laugh as he danced with Emily, he was gland his husband had as close a friend as her to turn to like he had Dave.  A tap on his arm had him turning.

“Care to dance?”  JJ asked.

Aaron smiled wide at her, “Absolutely.”  He took her hand and led her to the dance floor.  As they turned, he spotted Will sitting at the table with a sleeping Henry in his lap.  Will gave him a smile and a nod.  Hotch pulled the petite blonde in close and they began to sway.

“You both look so happy.  You’ve been smiling more in the last few months.”

“I have?”  He looked down at her.

“It’s good.  At the moment, we have some things in common.”

“Beside’s the boys?”

She nodded, glancing to where her husband sat and then back up.  “We’ve now both gotten married in Rossi’s yard.”

“True.” 

She pressed up on her toes so she could speak softer, “And we’re both expecting a new baby.”

He pulled back and looked down at her with a big grin.

“This isn’t an official announcement; you are sworn to secrecy on fear of going so far missing even Pen won’t be able to find you.”

He nodded and gave her a hug before resuming their dance.  When the song ended he glanced over to Will, who gave him a quick nod indicating he’d known what his wife was going to tell him.

An hour later, Spencer was pulling him to the side of the yard, “Rossi said Jack is staying the night.  He told me to get you and head out.  He said Jack’s already aware we’re going to sneak away.”  Hotch glanced once back to where his son was sitting at a table, nearly asleep.

“Okay.”


	8. Chapter 8

Two weeks after their wedding found the team on their third day of a case just outside of Huston, Texas.  The locals hadn’t been particularly pleased by their presence, but were cooperative enough and the case was finally starting to gain some ground.  It was late when Hotch had ordered everyone back to the hotel and he was sitting in his room, files spread around him still at two in the morning. 

The first knock at his door was almost soft enough for him to miss, but the second knock was more insistent.  Hotch frowned as he rose, not bothering to pull on his shirt as he opened the door in just lounge pants. 

JJ stood in the hall in sweats, arms tight around her and tears in her eyes.  “I need driven to the hospital.”

Hotch hesitated a moment, briefly wanting to ask why she came to him instead of Emily or someone else, but chose to instead turn back into his room and start changing.  He didn’t say a word as he gathered his keys, wallet, and phone and led her to the elevator to the parking lot.  As they neared the SUV, he caught her wince, but instead of speaking, he helped her in and hurried to get in himself.

The short ride was silent until she sniffed and wiped her face.

“I… Are you okay seems like the wrong question.”

JJ swallowed and nodded, saying nothing.

When they arrived at the ER, Hotch parked right at the entrance and helped her out of the vehicle.  He hurried in and quietly spoke to a nurse who sent JJ a sympathetic glance before handing Hotch a clipboard and motioning JJ to a wheelchair.  The nurse turned to Hotch, “Follow me; there will be a quiet place to sit and fill that out.”

Hotch followed obediently and sat where directed, filling in the parts of the paperwork he know how.

At some point a nurse stopped by to collect the clipboard.  An hour later, another nurse stepped out of the room and asked if he was Hotch.  When he confirmed, she motioned him into the room, “She’s asked for you.”

JJ was lying on her side in the bed, facing away from him when he entered, “JJ?”

She turned slightly to see him, “Did you bring your phone?”  She whispered.

He nodded, “Yeah.”

“I forgot mine at the hotel.  I need to call Will.”

He pulled the item out of his pocket and handed it over, “I’ll give you a few minutes.”

JJ waited until the door clicked shut before dialing her husband’s number, surprised when it popped up as in Hotch’s contacts.

“Hotch?”  Will drawled sleepily.

“No, It’s me.”

She could hear Will shuffle around, “What happened?  Lose your phone?”

“No, I,” She gasped, “I forgot it when we came to the hospital.”

“What happened?  Why’re ya at the hospital?”

She gasped out a strangled sob.

“Jen?”

“The baby, Will.  I lost the baby.”

Will was quiet a moment, “I wish I was there with you.  I’m so sorry, hon.  Are you alone?”

“Uh, Hotch brought me to the hospital; he’ll be back in a minute.”

“Okay.  I’ll be waiting when you get home.  If you can come home sooner, just let me know, I’ll come pick you up.”

“I’ll talk to Hotch.”

“Okay, Jen.  I’ll let you go for now.”

“Bye Will.”  She waited until the line disconnected before turning on her side and sobbing into her pillow.

Hotch stepped in moments later to find her in the same position.  He cautiously rounded the bed and sat in the chair, “JJ?”

She tried to hold back another sob and cracked her eyes open.

Hotch reached out and placed his hands around hers, not saying a word.

They sat like that for some time, JJ alternating between quiet tears and resting, Hotch silently providing support.  The doctor entered finally, paperwork in hand.  “Mrs. Jareau, I have your discharge paperwork.  I understand you’re here on work, but I advise taking some time.”  He glanced at Hotch and back at her.

“I’ll be okay.”  She pushed herself up in the bed.

“That may be the case, but right now you should be your number one priority.”  The doctor stopped when she shot him a glare.

“Are you discharging her?”  Hotch decided to step in.

“Yes.”  He handed over the paperwork and showed JJ where to sign.  “You’re free to go.  Please return if anything changes that has you worried.”

Hotch nodded on JJ’s behalf and watched the doctor leave.  Once the door shut, “I can get you a flight home.”

“No.”  She pushed out of the bed, looking for her things.

“JJ,” he sighed, “Did you reach Will?”

She glared at him before realizing he was simply being worried.  They all knew Hotch was capable of being the worst mother hen of the team, “Yeah, we talked.”

He nodded, “Okay.  I can’t make you go home, but I can put you on limited duty.  No takedowns, nothing strenuous, okay?”

She nodded and followed him out to the SUV.  Trying to get in, she winced again.

“JJ?”

“Just cramps.”  She responded.

He frowned but said nothing more the entire trip back.  He was just reaching his room when Spencer stepped out of his own, “I wondered where’d you’d gone.”

“I, uh, I had to take care of something.  What did you need?”

“Nothing.  Is everything okay?”

“No, but it’s not something I can discuss.”  He met Spencer’s eyes and his husband simply nodded.

“Okay.”

=====

Hotch tried to surreptitiously watch JJ the rest of the day.  He worried about her, but she put on a god front so no one would suspect something was wrong.

By dinner they’d ID’d their unsub and most of the team joined the LEOs in pursuit of the man.  Hotch had managed a good reasoning for why he and JJ had to sit it out.

“How are you holding up?”

She looked up at him, “I’m ready to be home.”

He frowned at her, “I wish you would have let me send you this morning.”

“We’re leaving by tomorrow, I’m okay.  I need to be here.”

“Will you at least go sit, take a break?”

She glanced around the otherwise empty room, “Yeah.”

=====

On the flight home, JJ was curled on the far end of the couch wrapped in a blanket.  Spencer sat next to Hotch at the front of the jet, “Is JJ okay?”

Hotch glanced up at his spouse and down the aisle to the agent in question, “Yeah.”

Spencer’s brows pulled together.

“Just…she’s okay.”

Reid nodded and moved across the aisle to join the poker game.

Hotch looked over the top of his paperwork at the agent in the opposite corner, wishing he could go and check on her without drawing attention.  She glanced his way and he watched as she edged her cell phone along the seat.  He picked up his own phone and typed, _“Do you need anything?”_

_“Will.  Henry.  To be home.”_

_“It’s a short flight.  Physically, how are you?”_

She looked up at him, tears forming in her eyes.

He tucked his phone away and went to the back of the plane and started moving things around in the cupboards.  A moment later JJ was at his side.  “Please tell me how I can help?”

She glanced at their team, who was too involved in their game to pay them any attention.  She put a hand on his arm, “Being worried is enough. “

He nodded and handed over a cup of honey tea he’d made, “Here, at the very least it’ll help relax you.”


	9. Chapter 9

A week later Aaron was doing his best to make out the picture of their baby on the screen.  He and Jack had their noses nearly pressed to touching.  Spencer chuckled behind them and both turned.

“What?”

Jack smiled, “Do you know?”

“I think so.  Let’s wait and see what she tells us.”

The tech moved around and took a still shot, marking something on the screen, “See this?”  She asked Jack.

Jack nodded vigorously.

“Do you know what this is?”

Jack shook his head no and everyone chuckled.

“This part here tells me you’re getting a little brother.”

Jack jumped up and punched the air, “Yes!”

His parents laughed and pulled him close.

“Happy about that?”  Annie asked.

“I wanted a brother.”

=====

The trio found themselves later that evening at a baby store.  Jack and Spencer had grabbed a cart and taken off, leaving Hotch to mill around on his own.

“Can I help you?”

Hotch turned to see a sales associate.

“Hi, I’m Zoe.  Do you need help setting up a registry?”

Hotch glanced around from Spencer, but didn’t see him, “Aaron, and yeah.  My wife took care of everything with our first.”

Zoe nodded, “Do you know what you’re having?”

“Boy,” Hotch smiled.

“Well, if you want, we can look at themes.  Is there something you had in mind?”

He shrugged, “I’m not sure.”  He followed her to the back of the store and to a giant display wall of nursery décor.

“We have modern patterns, animals, cars and trains.”

Hotch walked along the wall and stopped halfway down, “This. Definitely this.”

Zoe opened the folder he hadn’t noticed she’d been carrying and jotted it down, “Do you want to go ahead and buy it today?”

“I’ll have to ask my husband.  He’ll love it though.”

The carried on through the various display of furniture and found Spencer and Jack sitting in a small display with a deep grey crib and dresser.  “We like this, Daddy.”  Jack declared as Hotch approached,

Zoe quickly worked out this was Aaron’s husband and son, “IT would look great with the bedding you chose.”

Spencer looked up from the glider, “You picked out bedding already?”

Aaron smiled, “Classic Peter Rabbit.”

Spencer smiled, “Oh.  Well, Jack and I like this.  And we’ll need all the pieces and the chair.”

Zoe scribbled the item numbers down while Aaron glanced into the cart, “What have you guys found?”

“Toys!  These stimulate vision and coordination and the brain.  And this is just cute.”  He held up a stuffed puppy,

Jack leaned over the cart, “And some clothes.”  He tried to reach for the hanger but Hotch had to grab it for him.  Together they pulled out a tiny suit.  “He’ll look like you, Dad.”

Zoe spoke up, “Is there anything else I can help you with tonight?”

Hotch turned to her, “No.”

She handed him the folder, “Here’s your registry information.  You can add anything you want to it.”

“Thank you.”

They watched her leave and headed back to the infant clothing area to see what else there was.

=====

Over the following months, they watched Annie get bigger and enjoyed feeling the baby moving around in her belly.  When she would visit, Aaron would sit quietly with his hands on either side, enjoying feeling the baby roll and kick.

One afternoon, Annie asked Spencer about it, “Is he always that intense?”

“Sometimes.  He wants this baby so bad and he just wants to do his best to bond.”

“Have you two discussed names yet?”

“No, not yet.”

She rubbed her growing middle, “Should start thinking about it.”

That evening Hotch found Spencer in bed with baby books surrounding him.

He pushed his glasses back up his nose as he looked up at the older man, “What do you think about Trevor?”

“Trevor?”

“As a name.”

“Uhh, no.  I can’t see naming a kid that.”

“Seth?  Jonathan?”

Aaron slid onto the bed beside him.  “What else do you have?”  He read over the list, “That one.”

“Ryan?”

“Yeah.”

“Ryan Hotchner?”

“Ryan Reid-Hotchner.”  Aaron continued looking at the list.  “Middle name?”

“I don’t know, I came up with Ryan.  You make a list.”

“Jeremy.”

“That’s your list?”

“Yeah.  Ryan Jeremy Reid-Hotchner.”

Spencer stared down at him a minute, “He sounds like a law firm.”

Aaron pushed him over as he laughed, knocking books to the floor as he climbed above his partner and pressed down a kiss.  “A name to grow into.”

“If he grows up to hate it, I’m blaming you.”

Hotch’s hands started roaming under Spencer’s shirt, “I’d expect nothing less.  Soon we will have a newborn and sex will be but a dream.”  He tugged up on the shirt.

“So we should do it all the time now?”

“Something like that.”  He got the offending top off and started sucking a path down the slim body under him causing the young man to squirm in a fit of laughter.  “I want to make love to you.”

“Take me.” Spencer breathed.  He shifted as Aaron pulled off his boxers before lifting up to remove his own clothes.  He relaxed into the caresses as Hotch took his time caring for him.

Slowly Aaron worked Spencer open and gently slid himself in his tight passage.  “God, I love the feel of you around me.”  He took his time, slowly sinking in and pulling out, kissing the man beneath him.

“Please Aaron, please take me.”  Spencer gasped.

Aaron wrapped one large hand around the cock bobbing between them and slowly drove him over the edge, Spencer’s release coating the both of them before Aaron refocused on his own growing orgasm as he toppled over the edge as well.

After cleaning up, both men laid spooned in the bed.  “We need to get Ryan’s room put together.”

Aaron smiled at hearing the name, “We’ll take care of it this weekend.”


	10. Chapter 10

A week later, Morgan’s truck was parked out from of the Reid-Hotchner home and various members of the team were busy unloading furniture and inside assembling and decorating.  Painting had been taken care of the day before and by mid afternoon the ladies had pushed the expectant parents downstairs so they could decorate unhindered.

Spencer set to ordering food for everyone while Aaron tried to negotiate his way back into the nursery.  When the food arrived, everyone headed out back to relax.  “Thanks for coming and helping with all this,” Spencer said.

“Hey, no problem.  We’re family.”  JJ patted his knee.  “Plus, it’s fun to do this kind of thing.”

“And after we eat, you guys can see the finished product!”  Garcia exclaimed.

“It’s done?  Already?”  Hotch looked over at her.

“Yes, and we have a surprise.”

After they ate, the team corralled Hotch and Reid up the stairs and into the nursery where the two men stood in amazement.  The plain walls had been covered in framed art that coordinated with the bedding and wall stickers danced around the room.  A mobile hung from the ceiling and a Peter Rabbit rug was in the middle of the floor.  Every inch of the room was decorated in some way.  Aaron spotted the open closet and dresser, full of clothes and other things the baby would need. “We hadn’t…Did you guys buy all this?”

Penelope nodded, “Uh huh.”

“Wow, this is amazing.”  He turned in the room.

“There’s something else,”  JJ told them.  She turned as Rossi reappeared in the doorway pushing a stroller and carseat.  “Top of the line, safe, and there are bases for both cars.”

Spencer moved to check it out, “You guys didn’t have to do this.”

“It’s the official gift from the team,” Dave answered.

“Yes,” Emily pulled something else out, “And this is officially from JJ, Pen, and I.”  She handed it to Hotch.

He pulled the item out of the gift bag and looked up at the women.

JJ smiled, “A baby carrier, a good one.  Then you can wear him while doing other things.  It’s a great way to bond.”

“Thank you.”

=====

As Annie’s due date drew closer, Aaron and Spencer put in the paperwork for each of them to take leave.  The team made sure everything was ready for the pair to be away for an extended period of time.  Morgan would be stepping up and Chief for the month both would be out together.

At Annie’s thirty-six week appointment, they listened to the heartbeat and watched baby Ryan squirm and try to stretch in the increasingly cramped space.  After the appointment they agreed that after the following week, both would be on stand down until delivery.

The following Tuesday Hotch called Annie just like every morning to see how she and the baby were doing.  Once assured everything was fine, he prepared for work.

The case JJ handed them as they entered was an urgent one.  A child had been abducted across the state and their presence was demanded immediately.  The seven members of the team rushed to the vehicles and took off across the state.

When dealing with hostage situations, it was common practice to leave their personal phones and devices behind in the vehicles to prevent any distractions.  No one saw in mid-afternoon when Hotch’s phone lit up and vibrated onto the floor.  No one saw a minute later when Reid’s phone in the trunk buzzed to life either.

One by one, while the team was working with SWAT to storm the house and save the little girl, each of the team’s phones lit up and then fell silent when they were ignored.

Penelope Garcia was the only team member who consistently broke the rule.  When her phone lit up and she saw it was Annie, she connected the call.  “Annie?”

A strangled sort of sound came down the line, “Aaron and Spencer need to come now.”

“Where are you?”  Garcia tried to block out the sound of her team in her ear.

“…Hospital.”

“What?  Why?”

“I couldn’t feel the baby move as much so I called for an ambulance.  Oh god, Pen.”  She took a ragged breath.  “They need to come.  The doctor’s said they have to induce me.”

Penelope tried to follow Annie and her team shouting, “Why?”

“They can’t find a heartbeat.  Can you get Aaron and Spencer here?”

“Oh my god!  Yes! I’ll take care of it!”  She disconnected the private line.

“What Garcia?  Take care of what? Do we need to pull back?”  She heard Rossi demanding through her ear.  She’d somehow turned on her com mic. 

“Umm, nothing, find the girl.”

Rossi sighed, “Everyone else is moving in, should only be a moment, what’s going on?  What needs taken care of?”

“Nothing, I was on the other line, sorry.”

“Other line?”

“My phone rang, my private one.”

“Why do you sound funny?  Who was it?”

“No one.”   A sob escaped and she tried to hide it, “We have to focus now.”

Rossi’s concern bled through the line, “Garcia.”

There were shouts and the sound of gunfire from inside and Garcia couldn’t help but cry, “Sound off?”

“I’m good and I’ve got JJ and Morgan,”  Emily replied.

“Good too.”  Reid added in.  “And I think Hotch took out the unsub.”

Rossi pressed again, “Everything’s fine now Garcia, so tell me what’s wrong.”

“Annie called.”

There was silent across the coms.

“Garcia?”  Emily softly asked.

“Annie’s at the hospital and needs Hotch and Reid there now.  Right now.”

Someone inhaled sharply, though Garcia couldn’t tell who and then her ear was full of the sounds of her team mates passing tasks off to locals and SWAT.  She gathered her things and headed for the SUV just as her team was pushing past the circle of officers. 

Morgan jumped into the driver’s seat while JJ and Emily climbed into the far back, no one stopped to even remove their vests.  Garcia found herself in the back seat alongside Hotch and Reid while Rossi navigated the fasts way back to the interstate.

Reid was asking questions, wanting to know exactly what Annie had said while Hotch simply sat in stunned silence, staring at the leather seat in front of him.

=====

The hospital’s maternity ward had not been prepared for seven exhausted, armed, agents to burst through the elevator doors.  A nurse stood and put her hand up, “Family only past here.  Who are you looking for?”

Reid was puffing, “Annie Smith, she’s our surrogate.”  He motioned at Hotch.

The nurse’s face fell into a sympathetic frown, “I’ll take you to her.  I’m so sorry.  It shouldn’t be much longer now.”

The rest of the team staggered into the waiting room while the pair was led to Annie.

Spencer rushed to her, wrapping his arms around her, “This isn’t your fault.  How are you doing?”

“Any minute and it will be time to push him out.”  Tears ran down her face, “I’m so sorry.”  She glanced over to Hotch, who took a seat in the corner.  Silent.

Sometime later, the doctor stepped in and announced it was time to deliver the baby.  Spencer took a position next to Annie’s head, sending concerned glanced to his silent spouse.  He helped her breathe and count through the first round of pushing.  The doctor told her to just relax and breathe a minute, that the baby’s head was just starting to crown; the next push would see it out.  Suddenly Hotch was at the doctor’s side, “May I?”

The doctor looked up at the sullen man and then down to Annie who nodded slightly. The doctor waved a nurse over with supplies and he sat Aaron where he could catch the baby.

A moment later, Annie was bearing down and Hotch watched as the sleeping face of his son appeared in his hands.  He didn’t pull his eyes away as the baby with a head full of dark hair slipped into his arms.


	11. Chapter 11

Rossi had resumed pacing when Reid entered the waiting room.

“Ryan Jeremy Reid-Hotchner was born at three oh four A.M., nine pounds eleven ounces and twenty inches long.  He has a head full of dark hair,” He glanced at Emily, “Aaron is sitting with him.”

Rossi pulled the young man into a firm hug, “What do you need?”

“We would like to share him with you.  You are our family.  They’ve moved Annie to another room to rest.  The nurses said you can come back all together.  We won’t have long now before they have to take him.”

Everyone stood and began to file out, Emily took Reid’s wrist and pulled him into another hug, “I’m so sorry.  If you need anything, ever, you ask.  Okay?”

He nodded and wiped his eyes.

One by one they filed in to the quiet room, Hotch was sitting in a rocker cradling the bundle of blankets in his arms. 

Emily approached, staring down at the result of her and his genetics mixed together.  She placed one hand on Aaron’s shoulder and ran a finger down the baby’s cheek.  When Aaron looked up, she stared into his tear-filled eyes.  “I’m so sorry.”

He nodded, chin trembling, and glanced to his husband who took the baby.  Once his arms were free, he pulled Emily into a crushing hug and began to cry.

Rossi was having a hard time controlling his own emotions; the sight of the little boy in Spencer’s arms brought back memories of his own son.  He felt slender hands tug him close and found himself wrapped in JJ’s embrace.  The two wept quietly for the loss.

Spencer stared down at his son, their son.  The baby they’d been planning for for so long.  He couldn’t’ believe that just the morning before, less than twenty four hours ago, his little boy was alive and kicking and now he was holding the tiny lifeless form.  He found himself being pulled into the strong arms of Morgan and Garcia and trusted they wouldn’t let him fall, so he let go.

=====

By evening Aaron and Spencer were sitting in their home alone.  The team had agreed to give the couple some time and after several hours talking with Jack, Jessica had agreed to take him for a while. 

The quiet sound of the clocks ticking, all slightly out of sync, pushed Spencer to stand and softly announce, “I’m going to go shower.”  Aaron barely nodded before the younger man fled.

Left alone, Hotch headed for the liquor cabinet and poured half a glass of scotch.  More than he ever poured at once.  More than he drank in the entirety of most evenings.  He sat and drank, trying not to think of the small face of his son wrapped in blankets.  When he heard the shower turn off, he raised the glass only to find it empty, so he opted for a refill before his husband returned.

Spencer rejoined Aaron and spotted the nearly empty glass.  He moved to pour his own drink, “Would you like another?”

“Please.”

Spencer nodded, unaware of how full and how many glasses had already been consumed.  He filled the glass more than normal and returned it.  The two drank in silence.

Once the glasses were empty, Reid collected then and coaxed Hotch up to head to bed, surprised by the older man’s drunken state.  He couldn’t fault him for wanting to forget.  He helped Aaron into bed, opting to leave him dressed as he was.

=====

Spencer woke just before dawn to the distant sounds of a bad hangover.  He stumbled to the bathroom and stared down at his spouse, “Are you okay?”

Hotch coughed, “Yeah.”

“How much did you drink?”

He was in no condition to answer.

Spencer knelt to care for him.  “Just relax, don’t try to stop it.”  He wet a cloth and ran it across Aaron’s face and neck.

Eventually Hotch sat back against the tub, “I’m okay.”

“No.  You’re not.  But you will be eventually.”  He sat down beside him.  “It hurts.  A lot.  I think right now I’m so upset I can’t even cry.  It hasn’t really hit yet.”

Aaron stood and rinsed his mouth out, gagging slightly on the water and then put his hands out to pull Spencer up, “Come lay with me?”

“Of course.”  He followed his partner back to bed.

=====

The funeral was arranged for three days later.  Spencer pretended not to notice Hotch drinking the night before, figuring it was his way of coping with what was to come.  He simply helped him up the stairs when he couldn’t manage them and got him cleaned up for bed.

The morning of the service, Hotch was dressed and drank three cups of coffee by the time Reid was ready to leave.  Spencer pulled him into a hug, “I love you.  I love you and I love Jack and I love our home here and there isn’t anything on Earth that will change that.  Understand?”

Hotch nodded.  “I love you too.”

“You grieve in whatever way you need and I will be right here, beside you.  I can’t really think of a single trauma worse than the loss of a child.  It’s not the natural order of things.  Try to promise me you won’t rush it?  That you won’t hide your grief and pain so far down that it eats you from the inside?”

“I’ll try, Spencer, I promise I’ll try.”

The pair put on a brave face during the service and the gathering after.  Spencer kept an eye on his partner and only saw him drink water and coffee.  He assumed Hotch had a handle on things and didn’t bring it up.  Emily found her way to Reid once the gathering started to break up, wanting to share her own extended grief for the loss of the child that was, genetically, part hers.  They held each other for a while, talking about what could have been and how empty they felt.

That night, Spencer felt the bed shift as Aaron got up.  He silently followed him downstairs where Aaron poured a large glass of drink.  He saw the glass get refilled several more times before he stumbled back to bed.  Spencer had rushed back under the covers and lay very still, listening to the sounds of Aaron knocking into furniture and the doorframe.  He didn’t move as Aaron landed on the bed and cried himself to sleep.

Once he had passed out, Spencer rolled over and stared down at him.  Aaron hadn’t shaved in days, probably not since the morning of the day they got the call.  Spencer ran his hand over the stubble that was becoming a full on beard and up into Aaron’s hair that was starting to go slightly shaggy.  “Please let me in.”  He whispered into the silence.


	12. Chapter 12

The next morning Jack returned home.  He and Spencer made plans to get out of the house for a few days, since both men had already put in for a month and a half of leave together before alternating the rest.  They travelled up to Maine, taking their time driving up and staying a few days before turning back.  Spencer happily noted the first week that Hotch didn’t reach for a drink once, so he stopped worrying. 

On their last night in Maine, their hotel room shared a wall with a young family who had a new baby.  When the baby began to cry, Aaron began to drink.  Jack was already asleep and the room was small, so Reid didn’t want to argue, instead he allowed him to drown his demons.  Aaron cleared the mini-bar and while Reid was in the bathroom, he slipped out of the room in search of more.  Two nerve-wracking hours later, he fumbled his way back in.

Spencer checked to make sure Jack was still asleep and helped his partner up and practically dragged him to the bathroom.  “How much?”  He got no answer, “How much, Aaron?”

Hotch looked at him blearily, a tear tracked its way down his cheek.

Spencer started digging through his pockets, eventually finding a credit card receipt for a liquor store, “Did you drink all of this?”  He stared at the slip for a six pack of beer.  “If you pass out on me, I’m taking you to the hospital.”

The word hospital seemed to get through and Hotch’s gazed snapped into focus for a split second, “No.”

Spencer sighed, “Fine.  Let’s get you to bed.”  He did his best to help the larger man stand, shouldering much of the weight.  He tipped him onto the empty bed and gathered spare towels and the trashcan just in case.  “This needs to be the last time.”  He said to the darkness.

He was startled awake by Hotch kneeling on the floor, hugging the can and Jack climbing into his bed asking if Daddy was okay,

“He ate something that didn’t agree with him, Jack.  He’ll be okay.”  He figured the half-lie contained some truth, he had consumed something that made him ill and the boy didn’t need to know the details.  “We’ll get him some water and some breakfast and make him better.”

Jack nodded, watching his dad with a worried gaze.

“Go get dressed and we’ll grab breakfast, okay?”  Once the boy vanished into the bathroom, Spencer rested a hand on Aaron’s neck, “We’ll go get breakfast, you clean up.”

Aaron groaned at the thought of food, gasping to catch his breath, and squinted at the younger man, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, just try better.”  He stood and when Jack reappeared, they left.

=====

Two days after returning home, Hotch announced he was cancelling the remained of his leave and returning to work the next week.

“Are you sure?  I’m not ready to go back, its okay if you’re not either.”

“No, I need to go back to work.  Please?”

Reid nodded, “I need to go visit my mom.   Spend some time there.  Will you be okay without me?”

“Yeah, we’ll be fine.”

Spencer called Morgan to let him know the change of plans and arranged for his flight.  Hotch agreed to stay home with Jack another week before returning to the office and he didn’t argue when Spencer wanted to remove all the alcohol from the house before he left.

Once Spencer left in Morgan’s car, Hotch turned to his son, “What should we do this week Buddy?”

“Can we go to the Natural History Museum?”

“Sure.  I think I heard there’s a new exhibit opening.  We can go check it out.”

Jack nodded excitedly and finished his breakfast.

Aaron cleaned up the kitchen and looked up the times for the exhibit and they set off.  It ended up being so full of interesting things they weren’t able to see it all at once and Jack talked his dad into returning later in the week.

The night before Hotch was to return to work, he called Spencer.  “How is Vegas?”

“Good.  Mom’s…rough.  I’m going to stay with her for a few nights and see if I can help her even out.”

“I hope it helps her.”

“Me too.”  He let the silence fill the space a minute, “Are you still returning to work tomorrow?”

“Yeah.”

“Any issues this week?”

“No.  Jack and I have been to the museum twice.  It’s been good.”

“I’m glad.  You both needed time together like that.”  He heard Hotch yawn, “I’ll let you go, you have an early morning in the morning.”

“Try to sleep Spencer; you won’t be able to focus on helping if you are tired.”


End file.
